I have long been fascinated with how the mind works, and especially how our brain filters the reality we perceive. I read somewhere long ago that the mind filters out like 90% of the information the senses deliver, allowing us to focus on the “important” bits. Well, maybe all the bits are important to me! And, having tripped god’s doses of hallucinogens in my life, I knew there was so much more than what science even may consider the 100% of sensory information. So I began assays into probing my sensory input and attempting to toggle my perception.
Off the top of my head, here are some of my experimental results: I can turn my sense of smell off and on easily, I can see double on command easily (with central focus to about 15 degrees on either side, but not the entire field), I once was able to turn my vision upside down. You may recall that when light (which carries the vibrational signature of what it last bounced off of) enters our eyes, the lens flips the image. Somewhere between retina and the image of the world that exists inside our mind (remember eyes are only input devices - not output, the projector and the screen are both singularly within the mind), there is a filter that right-side-ups the image. I worked for months to turn the filter off and see the upside down image.
Recently, I’ve been experimenting with turning my hearing on and off. This one began by giving notice to how we all have selective hearing sometimes. You don’t hear the way the person at the meeting is clicking their retractable pen incessantly, you don’t hear the refrigerator kick on. There’s a million examples of this. The sound enters the brain and doesn’t make it past the unconscious filter that chooses for us what is important and what is not.
I’ve often worked on noticing the moment of falling asleep and more-so, of waking up. It’s this latter space I am better at. I can feel my paralyzed body return to feeling, I can live in the dream a bit longer, and I noticed, I can observe when my hearing returns to my awareness. This is often quite surprising, like the other night when a rambunctious party was going on on my porch till dawn! The drunken and loud jubilance of Jerry suddenly appeared mid-sentence as I slowly awoke. So I figure, I can learn to toggle my hearing as well.
Fast forward to last weekend at my first Tibetan Yoga Meditation at Rime Center (9 am on Sundays). There is a clock on the wall with an audibly ticking second hand. It’s annoying me! So, I remember, Oh, maybe I can turn my hearing off. Now this next part may sound wild to some of you, it was wild to me, too.
I said to myself, turn off the sound of the ticking clock, and the ticking instantly disappeared. I’ve learned over many years that reacting with shock and surprise will immediately end the new experience, so I’m still deeply relaxed … just noticing. The ticking stays gone for a long time. Then, it reappears, but with looooong ticks and tonal variations, sounding a bit like a cross between a tick-tock and a whale song. I requested it to stop again and it did. Another long period of silence. Now, I can hear the teacher, I can hear the singing in the chapel across the hall, I can hear the HVAC turn on and fan blow intermittently, just not the ticking clock. The ticking returns, this time it is at double speed, ticktickticktickticktick. I turn it off again.
The entire episode was probably 25 minutes? I went over to the clock after to see if it was keeping proper time and working correctly, it was. I walked away with proof of concept that I can toggle selective hearing at will, but something more interesting happened here. Neurologist Oliver Sacks (RIP) has shown scientifically with his famed “Awakenings” patients that the mind is fully able to warp time and experience time in different speeds than an outside observer is experiencing.
Did my meditation state alter time that day? I heard slow ticks and fast ticks and normal ticks. The clock is unbroken. The perception of the ticking is internal. Does meditation alter time regularly, but I never noticed before this experiment? How can I continue to experiment with time itself?
…
Come join me for Mind Games, on June 29th at InterUrban ArtHouse! We will be doing some of my invented meditations that focus on playing attention, writing backwards, and listening skills. (Not turning off our hearing, though! hehe) This is an ongoing series where we play together in the world of our mind’s perceptions at the intersection of art and meditation.
this week:
Saturday, June 8:
9-noon I’ll be at the Ivanhoe Farmers Market doing Tarot Portraits!
Writers Circle at Cherry Pit Collective, 1-3 pm (the last one!)
every week:
Thursdays:
11 am Nettie teaches meditation at Inner Space Yoga, free class, 45 minutes long, register on the website to attend. or just show up, it’s all good!
upcoming:
Friday, June 21:
Poetry takes (P)residence at The Brick! more info TBASaturday/Sunday, June 22/23:
KC ZINE CON!
Saturday, June 22:
Full Moon Bonfire, wood gathering at 5 fire at 7, dm for deets
Thursday-Sunday, June 27-30
Trans Joy Camping Weekend!Saturday, June 29:
Mind Games: the Art and Play of Meditation: an evening of mindfulness games and community. FREE at InterUrban ArtHouse
July 4-18:
Camping the Ouachita National ForestFriday, July 19:
Poetry takes (P)Residence at the Brick! more info TBA
Thursday, August 1:
featured reading with River Cow Orchestra Jazz and Poetry event at Westport Coffeehouse, doors at 6:30 pm
Saturday, August 10:
9-noon I’ll be at the Ivanhoe Farmers Market doing Tarot Portraits!
Friday, August 16:
Poetry takes (P)Residence at the Brick! more info TBAIt’s the Little Things art opening at IUAH 5-8
Saturday, September 14:
9-noon I’ll be at the Ivanhoe Farmers Market doing Tarot Portraits!
Friday, September 20:
It’s the Little Things Closing Reception, and my birthday: 48!
check out my new website!
this is my dysfunctional blog
oh my youtube channel is full of freakish delights
Books by Nettie for purchase:
a shame to point at the moon and see only the finger: 2024 book of persona poems
everything i never told you is all i have to say: 2024 book of epistolary prose poems written from the narrator Bitter Crone
Ozark Love Poems and a Song of Despair: 2023 sonnets and a song. very nice!
Dive Zine: 2017 art-book reproduction describing my time with Cotard’s Syndrome
Sage: 2017 art book about womanhood, now resides in the Nelson-Atkins local artists collection
this is so cool and clear and exciting - thank you for being a brilliant cosmonaut in our midst!